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I'm a testament to many fuck ups! But the difference between how I handle things and how others handle things is usually remarkably different.

While I am reflective, I don't hang my head in shame. Fuck ups help you transform into the person you are destined to be. While they never feel good in the midst of all hell breaking loose, things always turn out as they should.

Here are some proactive measures you can take to redirect your course:

  1. Recognize and acknowledge the mistake. Own it! Half

    of the angst comes from the cover up.

  2.  Get to the root of it. Why did you make the decision you made.  What was your intent?  Reflect and ask yourself, What could I have done differently?

  3. Set yourself up so that you do not repeat it. This may mean removing yourself from a situation or keeping certain people out of your life. This can be an extremely hard thing to do, but sometimes it’s necessary so you can move forward.

  4.  Don’t dwell there. The past is no place for a healing spirit. Growth comes from moving on.

  5. Use the time when you would normally be wallowing in self pity and regret to chart a plan of action. Set a new course and perhaps find a way to right your wrong.

  6. Be kind to yourself and love yourself through the process. There is so much good that comes out of loving yourself.


Sometimes what seems to be a major fuck up can turn out to be a blessing. God often places us in precarious situations to lead us to rethink our path. Reflection is key. While I  am by no means condoning a lack of acceptance, I am suggesting that regardless of your situation, there is always another opportunity to change your path.

Whether you messed up your relationship, made a big mistake at work, crossed a line with a friend — whatever it is that has made the pit of your stomach sink and made you feel like you are the worst person in the world — you are not.  

You are not what you did.  Just because you were wrong doesn’t mean you are a bad person. Feel the regret, apologize, right the wrong if you can — but then do the work to change your course and move forward better than you were yesterday. 

You live, you learn, you grow. This is what we are all here to do.

Until next time,

November

S N